Summer Pilgrimmage

I was about to give up on the blog, but I'm going to give it another shot. I feel like I've given too much to it to give up now. So, here we go ...

Here are some pictures from our trip to Kentucky in July.

Iles cousins:

Nate, Evie, Sam, Will, Ethan, Simon, Andrew, and Ellen

 Evie and Ellen

 It had been too long since the three of us were together. 

All three of these babies have been born since then.

 Andrew

 Nate and Andrew

Evie and Will

 Nathan and Andrew

 Samuel

 Playing with Uncle Nathan

 Erica and Andrew

We walked across the bridge and spent a morning in Cincinnati at a splash park:

 The Blans:

 Katie teaching Stephen how to shoot a bow and arrow.

 Cameron, Simon, Nate, Katie, and Evie

 Story time with Aunt Annie

Evie's Preschool Graduation

It's really hard to believe Evie will be starting Kindergarten this fall! Her preschool graduation was a few weeks ago. The graduation program was sweet, and I only had to choke a few tears back. Seriously, I'm sad to see our kids' days at Wee School end, but I'm really excited to see what the next few years hold. Here are some pictures from the graduation:

Simon stayed in the nursery during the ceremony, 

so he's absent from our pictures ... again!

Evie's class sang a few songs during the program. 

She sang every word of every song with this sweet smile on her face.  

Crossing the stage and receiving her diploma.

Evie's Five Birthday

Evie has been talking about her "five birthday" ever since she turned four. It's been quite exhausting at times. :) We've done our best to celebrate her well this weekend. Stephen took her and Nate to see the Island of Lemurs: Madagascar yesterday, followed by her restaurant of choice - Chick-fil-a. Today she woke up to a room filled with streamers and balloons, and we're having cake and ice cream and gifts this afternoon.

Evie has been asking for this princess cake ever since we finished off her butterfly cake last year. She loved it, LOVED IT, and I kept a good attitude about making it. Win win. I'm threatening retirement from cake decorating. It's not as much fun (for me) as it used to be. Anyway, now I need to get back to celebrating our sweet girl, so here are the pictures.

Circus Circus

Nate goes to a school of the arts, and for their Spring recital they performed the Circus Circus Children's Musical. Nate was a happy clown. He's in advanced dance, so he got to perform two dance numbers, along with singing and a speaking part. It was really cool. He has loved being in dance, and he seems to just love performing. No stage fright. He must get that from his dad.

I've worn many hats since becoming a mom, but this was my first time as a makeup artist. I could probably use some training, but Nate's happy clown makeup turned out okay. Here are some pics.

 Simon photo bombed us. :)

 It was hard to get good pictures at the recital, 

but in this picture Nate was center stage.

This one was during his dance part. He was spinning on the floor.

The other costumes were pretty impressive!

Spring Soccer

Nate and Evie played soccer for the YMCA again this spring. They both loved playing and are already begging to play again. Nate's coach also coached a 7/8 year old team, and a few games into the season he invited Nate to play with them. That meant going to three games each Saturday instead of two, but it was worth it. Nate played really well with them and improved even more. Evie also improved a lot and started to be more aggressive. She didn't just follow behind the crowd this year.

It's good to have our Saturdays and practice evenings back, but I loved watching them play - when I could. We also spent A LOT of time chasing and entertaining Simon during those games! I guess that's why we don't have many pictures to show for the season. Here's a couple from the last game day.

 I couldn't decide which picture I liked best, so I'll post both. :)

Six Years

So, here we are again. Another Mother’s Day. Mom died on Mother’s Day six years ago. So, this is the first time since then that we’ll celebrate the anniversary of her death on Mother’s Day. Every year I dread Mother’s Day. Advertisements for it begin the day after Easter (although this year I saw a commercial the evening of Easter), and escalate until the day. Especially the week before. Every morning show and talk show and commercial is finding the sweetest and best ways for you to celebrate your mom this Mother’s Day. It makes me nauseous.

So, I can run and hide during this season. No TV. No radio. No ads of any kind. No social media (which isn’t such a bad idea anyway). Or I can use this season to lean in. I can remember how the Lord spoke deeply into my soul that He is enough for me AND for these little people I spend my days with. And then I can recount how He has proven that time and again. I can ask the hard questions. I can rest assured that I’m not the only one.

I can reflect on the kindness and goodness of the Lord. I’m a different mom than I would’ve been without losing my own mom. When your world is turned upside down, so are the things you value. You see things differently. Rough edges are smoothed. Character is sharpened. Being a mom is a really hard job. But walking with joy in the hard – not escaping from it or even pushing through it, but finding unspeakable joy in it - is what will make me better. Because of this - because He’s taught me these things through loss - in the places of my heart where bitterness should be, gratefulness lies instead.

Soon after we lost Mom I clung tightly to verses like Psalm 147:3 that says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” I said many times that time doesn’t heal all wounds, He does. And it’s true. He does. But I thought healing meant that I would eventually reach a point of not grieving anymore. Of not being sad. Of not missing her and not wishing she were here. I get frustrated sometimes because I feel like I should be over this by now. It’s been six years. SIX years! Why can’t I shake this?

But I think I was wrong. She was my Mom. I’m not supposed to get over her. I’m supposed to honor and love her in the days and years after she’s gone. And I’m supposed to remember the example she set for me – the one of clinging to Jesus in the midst of grief.

The anticipation - the anxiety and the dread - of the upcoming day is always worse than the day itself. I know that six times over. It’s been ugly. But, as Sunday approaches, I’ll try not to hide. I’ll go to Muffins with Mom with Evie. And to a tea party Mother’s Day celebration with Nate. I’ll let them celebrate me. And, by His grace, I’ll be an example of joy and gratefulness to them during these days.

Easter Fun

 Stephen's mom and dad sent a package to the kids with these
bunny masks in it for Easter. So much fun!

 We baked a cake this year.
The kids helped me decorate it to look like an Easter basket.

Simon didn't get to eat any cake, but he did conquer the feat of
climbing into this chair by himself. Now he needs to figure out
how to put the cell phone on his ear instead of his head. :)

Zoo Run 2014

The Fort Worth Zoo Run is our favorite. We've participated in it one way or another for the past four years. Nate ran the 5k with Stephen last year for the first time, and we were impressed by how well he did. Then, in February, he ran in the Cowtown 5K and made even better time. We signed him up for the Zoo Run to see if he could improve his time even more. We knew there was a chance he'd place since he would be the oldest in his age group - zero to six years old. We didn't tell him that though. We went to the awards ceremony afterwards, and he was surprised when they called his name to go up on stage. He ran it in 31:43 and won first place! We didn't hear the end of it the rest of the day, but we're really proud of how hard he ran and how well he did.

While Stephen and Nate ran, I pushed the stroller and ran/walked with Evie and Simon. Evie wanted to run the 5k since Nate was, and she probably ended up running half of the race all together. I was impressed by that. She would run for a while, take a break, and then be ready to run some more. So proud of our kids! We left there and went to two soccer games and a birthday party. I think we all slept well that night!

 Nate getting his medal.

The toothless grin behind the medal is way more valuable than that medal!

Simon was a trooper. He didn't make a single fuss about being in that stroller all morning.

Simple Simon

Well, he's actually not very simple these days. In fact, he requires quite a bit of attention, redirection, discipline, you name it! At Simon's 15 month check-up his pediatrician described his age as a tornado. That's exactly what he is. A little tornado tearing through our house everyday. I had forgotten that about this age. But I also don't think Nate and Evie were nearly as busy as Simon is. Our house is a constant mess of emptied drawers and cabinets, with toys strung everywhere in-between. Amidst the tornadic activity, I've managed to take a couple pictures of our not-so-simple Simon the last couple weeks.

 One of Simon's favorite things to empty these days is our dirty laundry. 

He pulls everything out and gets inside the laundry cabinet. It might be a little 

unsanitary, but not as much as playing in the toilet water, so I don't mind it too much.

 LOVE those bright eyes peeking out at me!

He climbed up and sat with Stephen for a while on Saturday to watch the Duke game. 

Simon might be our busiest child, but he's also our cuddliest!

Eleven

Saturday was our wedding anniversary. I would love to write something long and sweet about our 11 years of marriage, but that just isn't going to happen right now. Instead, I'll recap our day and post a picture from the days when we looked a lot younger than we do now.

We spent our anniversary in Blan style. Nate and Evie had their first soccer games of the season, so they were out-of-their-minds excited about that. Both teams won and both kids came home with goals under their belts, so it was a happy day. Stephen made brownies and took the kids to the library to give me a few moments to myself. He tried to pick up takeout from our little Middle Eastern market on his way home, but they ran out of food and were closing down for the day. We had leftovers instead, with brownies and ice cream for dessert.

Last year, for our 10th anniversary, we showed the kids our wedding video my cousin's home video of our wedding for the first time, and they LOVED it! It became an easy tradition, so we watched it again on Saturday before putting the kids to bed. I love that they love it so much. 11 years ago I never would've guessed I'd be so happy to only have a home video of our wedding, but I love that we get to see the faces of our family and friends who were there. The wedding video I planned to have wouldn't have given that to us. Such a blessing in disguise.

We showed a slideshow during our wedding, and I wanted to post it here, but I can't figure it out right now. Maybe next year. For now, here's one of the pictures from it.

In December 2001, Stephen, a couple friends, and I drove to New Jersey to watch Duke and UK play. We made these signs to take to the game, but since 9/11 had just happened we weren't allowed to take the signs in. It was too bad, but still a great memory! Maybe our relationship has matured a little bit since then. Maybe.

Brief Thief

I started this post a month ago and never managed to finish. I'll try again. A couple weeks months ago the kids checked out a book called Brief Thief from the library. It was a funny book, but would be a bit offensive to anyone who doesn't enjoy a little bathroom humor. It ends with a character dressed like a superhero with a pair of underwear on his face.

When we finished reading it, Nate started sneaking around the house. He went back and forth between his bedroom and ours a couple times, and then he finally made his grand entrance - with a pair of underwear on his face like a superhero mask. He needed something to hold the eye holes open, so he found one of my hair clips to use. Of course Evie was quick to follow with her own pair and it was an evening of superhero fun!